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What a relief. After my many travels around the country to interview former Miss Americas for my book, Pretty Smart: Lessons from our Miss Americas – to places like Raleigh, Nashville, Louisville, Naples and Birmingham – down and back in one day, my commute to meet Gretchen Carlson who is currently a co-host on “Fox & Friends,” the number one rated cable news program, was a mere 25 minutes. I met her at the Starbucks in Greenwich, CT where she lives with her husband and two children.  I wished that we had met someplace quiet – but it had been hard enough to get her to respond.  I didn’t want to jinx anything by asking for another venue when we had been working out the arrangements.  When she walked in, she was shorter than I had thought she would be.  She turned out to be a petite 5’1,” giving lie to the stereotype that all Miss Americas are tall and willowy.   She wore a sleeveless v-neck top and black Capri’s, slim and chic, her blond hair cut in a bob just above her shoulders.  Her blue eyes were wide and engaging as was her personality.

Me & Gretchen at the Miss America Pageant Gala 2009

Me & Gretchen at the Miss America Pageant Gala 2009

I am struck once again, by the warmth and graciousness that all these formers exhibit.  You might question whether it is genuine.  It is.  Maybe they don’t always feel it, but the core of it is within them at all times and good breeding shows.  Her large blue eyes focus on my face as we talk.  She is more candid and forthcoming than I had anticipated.  She too is generous with her time.  It is almost two hours before I turn off my recorder and head out the door, more impressed than ever with the quality and depth of the women who become Miss America.  Each one is so different, different personalities, different ways of approaching life and yet the common thread is their drive and ambition and the desire to make a difference in others lives.

Gretchen’s story is one that leaves me breathless.  She was a child violin prodigy, performing at the Aspen Music Festival long before she could drive.  Though she came from a small town in Minnesota, her brains took her all the way to Stanford University in California and on to the University of Oxford in England.  In her teens she decided not to pursue the violin as a career, looking for a life that had a broader outline than her music stand.  At her parents’ encouragement, she participated in the Miss America system as a way to continue to showcase her extraordinary talent.  After winning the crown, she pursued a career in television news reporting, but found in the beginning that she was judged on her beauty not on her brains.  And for this scary smart woman, that was an a huge disappointment.  But Gretchen, like all her Miss America sisters, didn’t let that stop her. She pursued her goals until she reached the top.  She is now co-host on Fox news channel #1 rated cable news show, “Fox & Friends.”  Gretchen is so much more than pretty, she’s pretty smart!

Nothing like a little press when you’ve been working really hard to get the word out to make you feel like a million bucks.  Today in my Miss America Google alerts, this article about me popped up.  Wowsa!

About three weeks ago I had been interviewed by Bonnie Adler, a feature reporter for the Westport Minuteman here in Connecticut about my journey to write Pretty Smart: Lessons from our Miss Americas.  I had begun to despair that I would see it, given that she had been so enthusastic about my story and had said that it would probably be in the paper that very week.   Oh ye of little faith…

So I proved to myself once again, that patience is a virtue.  And I have to remind myself that it isn’t about me.  People with the best of intentions will sometimes not  do what they say they will do.  And though it may feel like a personal rejection, that is the farthest notion from those folks’ minds.

About four weeks ago, I sent out fourteen press releases and last week was the first time my seeds started to bear fruit.  The one other article that has been published so far I had written for those papers to publish.  For this article Bonnie interviewed me and wrote it herself. 

I remind myself everyday I have to keep taking steps forward even if it may seem for that moment that I’m on a treadmill and not making any headway.  Sooner or later, as long as I keep stepping, I’ll find myself in a different place.  And where ever I end up, the adventure is always worth it.  Now that’s pretty smart!

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